We are just about 5 weeks away from departure. Yesterday was one of those days when I questioned things. What exactly are we doing? We are about to head out to live in a house on wheels full time with 2 dogs. Colleen needs much of my attention. My job is ending in just about 2 months time without a real idea of how to make a living on the road. Needless to say fear and uncertainty gripped me.
I had to take a step back and really look at the situation. What really prompted this in the first place? I was uncomfortable in the present situation. Although my work was providing me with all of the leeway needed to take care of Colleen, something was missing. It seemed no matter what I tried to do to reduce this feeling, the correct answer was not presenting itself. A change was needed, action had to be taken. I believe this change was in the works long before I was conscious of it. There was an event that needed to happen in order for me to make a move. This brings to mind the story of a dog sitting on a nail. Here is how it goes:
One day, a man was walking down the street and sees a dog on a porch that was just sitting there, whimpering, whining and moaning. The man was curious as to why he was whimpering, so he went and knocked on the door and a guy came out and said, “Yes, how may I help you?” He said, “Sir, is this your dog?” “Yes, that’s my dog.” “Well, what’s wrong with him?” The owner of the dog said, “What do you mean?” “Well, he’s sitting here moaning and groaning.” The owner said, “Well, he’s actually sitting on a nail.” He said, “What! Your dog is sitting on a nail. Why doesn’t he get off?” “Well, it just doesn’t hurt him enough.”
I finally got off that nail as soon as I found out what it was that really energized Colleen. When she got energized about this adventure, I became determined to make it happen. Just like with many big ideas they take persistent determination. I believe this doubt and fear is simply part of the process. When I question if we are making the correct move, I just need to keep in mind how Colleen’s face lights up when we talk about the adventure.
Regardless if we would have continued with our life as it was or we were embark out on this adventure, they were both uncomfortable. It is just a matter of choosing the uncomfortable. I believe the correct uncomfortable is the one that is unknown with possibility of being great.
